On the heels of Greg Carlwood’s recent expedition to Conspiracy Con, here’s a Gorightly blast form the past…

Pilgrimage To Conspiracy Con (2007)

 

For the seventh consecutive year, conspiracy enthusiasts from far and wide made the pilgrimage to San Jose, California to take in the annual Conspiracy Con.  Located in the sumptuous setting of the Airport Doubletree Hotel, organizer Brian William Hall kicked off the proceedings with a pep talk, quoting Tom Jefferson’s “Dissent is the highest form of Patriotism”, which summed up why so many were drawn to this memorial weekend event. Ranging from the apparent illegality of the federal income tax to the secret agenda of those rascally Reptilians, the attendees were treated to a collection of some of the leading voices in the conspiracy research scene, who presented material challenging the consensus reality paradigm. Incidentally, Conspiracy Con coincided with the annual Bilderberg meeting in Istanbul that very same weekend. Coincidence? You decide!

During his intro, Hall remarked that whenever he’s asked if he’s a “Glass half empty” or a “Glass half full” kind of guy, he usually responds that he’s more concerned if there’s fluoride in the water, which I found one of the more humorous observations of the conference.

The first speaker scheduled was “America’s most beloved conspiracy theorist”, Kenn Thomas. However, the fickle finger of conspiracy works in mysterious ways, as Kenn’s flight was delayed due to being re-routed through Dallas, of all places. Fittingly enough, Kenn’s talk that day centered on the JFK assassination, so needless to say he was a little concerned about this ominous sounding detour. Nonetheless, Kenn eventually arrived in one piece, and in the interim his opening spot was filled by Joe Banister, an anti-federal tax advocate who I expected to be one of those wide-eyed-frothing-at-the-mouth I’ll be damned if I pay taxes sorts. But to the contrary, Banister came across as a sober and conservative spokesman who chronicled his days as a former IRS Special Agent.

Jerry Smith & Kenn Thomas

Jerry Smith & Kenn Thomas

During the 1990’s, Banister conducted an off duty investigation regarding claims he had heard that the federal income tax was a sham. After examining said claims, Banister came to this very same conclusion–that the income tax is indeed bogus–and that there’s no actual law on the books providing authority to enforce it. To this end, Banister put together a report stating such, which he delivered to his superiors. Their subsequent reply was for Banister to immediately tender his resignation, which–in turn–led to his new career path of whistle-blowing directed at his former employers. Due to these activities, Banister was brought up on charges for “Conspiracy to defraud the U.S.” and was ultimately found innocent on all counts. Go figure…

Throughout the morning agenda, the accompanying buzz was that “They” were watching us, which created a paranoid vibe similar to that X-Files episode featuring the Lone Gunmen where–at a defense contractor’s conference–one of their conspiracy buff colleagues is wacked for getting too close to the truth.  So this perceived spectre hovered over Conspiracy Con 7: that of New World Order operatives among us, monitoring our brainwaves with sophisticated mind control machinery. Soon I was likewise caught up in this web of intrigue, worrying that if I kept my back turned too long “They” would sneak up from behind, stick a hypodermic needle in the soft tissue of my scalp and eject shellfish toxin into my central nervous system, thereby rendering me silly. These are the random thoughts of the dedicated conspiracy researcher.

As Banister ended his lecture, I noticed my friend Doug Hawes had arrived and seated himself across the room, so I stealthily snuck up behind him and whispered: “Big Brother is watching you”, which brought a smile of recognition and a quick handshake, as it had been some time since Doug and I had last crossed paths.

Doug–as you may know–was my chief source for an article sometime back in SteamShovel Press entitled “Tuesday Weld Is Watching: The Shocking Truth of Occult Secret Societies in Santa Cruz”, which revealed (for the first time ever!) a conspiratorial cosmology involving 60’s sex kitten Tuesday Weld, an alleged descendant from a bloodline of Druidic witches, who secretly influenced such counterculture luminaries as the Beatles and the Rolling Stones, exercising her occult powers in the realms of political intrigue. But that’s another conspiracy theory altogether.

Next up was Jerry Smith, who discussed the central theme of Weather Warfare, which deals with the ongoing weather modifications practiced covertly by the shadow government via HARRP: The world’s largest radio broadcasting company. In this regard, HAARP doesn’t so much play music as it plays and entrains our brains at certain frequencies that may in time transform us into drooling automons–if television hasn’t done that already. For those not in the know, DARPA operates HAARP,  another acronym I won’t waste time explaining because if you’re reading this magazine then there’s a high probability you’re already up to speed with the various alphabet  soup agencies engaged in such improprieties.

Smith went on to illustrate the potential nefarious uses of HAARP, which theoretically has the ability to blow molecules apart then turn them into dangerous plasma released into the stratosphere, which may explain what caused the Columbia space shuttle disaster.

Smith also theorized that HAARP is being used by the Chinese to manipulate the collective brainwaves of their North Korean neighbors, and Kim Jong il in particular, who Smith sees as a contemporary Manchurian Candidate decked out in funky pant suits. This would go a long ways in explaining the odd behavior of this strange little man with the bouffant hairdo.

In between presentations, spectators ambled over to the vendor’s room to meet the likes of Jordan Maxwell, Ted Gunderson, Anthony Hilder and Dr. Stanley Montieth, as these conspiratorial giants held court while peddling their wares, which included the usual conspiratorial fare of Illuminati and 9-11 DVDS, mind control booklets and reptilian agenda rants. I found it immensely amusing that among his collection of conspiracy DVD’s, Anthony Hilder was also selling a couple of Rotisserie chickens!

Hilder's Hens

Hilder’s Hens

Mixed among the hardcore conspiracy mongers was the usual sprinkle of new age practitioners and assorted snake oil salesman, not to mention a Tesla Society member who I queried about the rumored Tesla/ET connection. And although the Tesla Society rep was unfamiliar with these rumors about Tesla channeling the space brothers, this was later confirmed during Montauk experiencer Stewart Swerdlow’s lecture: that indeed the Sirians are the universal masters of technology, and that Tesla was the recipient of their intergalactic knowledge!

In addition, Swerdlow’s presentation addressed the insidious spectre of mind control, and the involvement of the diabolical Reptilians, who are purportedly manipulating mankind via genetic manipulation as part of the Illuminati New World Order conquest of the planet! According to Swerdlow, these Venusian Reptilians have been visiting Earth in one guise or another for quite some time, going back to the golden days of the UFO Contactees. Apparently the Reptilians have a belt (not unlike Batman’s utility belt, only reptilian and used for evil purposes!) that superimposes the image of lovely angelic beings over the true evil countenance of these Reptilian scumbags. Perhaps this is why the early UFO contactees described their Venusians benefactors as being these blond haired blue eyed beings of universal love and light.

Among other world shattering revelations, I learned that humans are in reality reptilian/mammalian hybrids, and that those of us bent on world domination and other bad juju lean more toward the snakey side of our dualistic natures, which explains the Reptilian shapeshifting phenomenon that allegedly occurs to the likes of certain world leaders promoting the New World Order Agenda, such as the Queen of England, George Bush Sr. and dastardly Dick Cheney, to name but a few. To maintain their illusory forms, these Reptilians in human clothing (who, according to Swerdlow, are the true Illuminati masters) sacrifice human beings–and in specific children under twelve years of age–the type of sacrifices that allegedly go down each year at Bohemian Grove where the world’s elite powerbrokers gather to plot the further adventures of the New World Order. And, according to Swerdlow, the point of these sacrificial rituals is the extraction of a certain chemical juice in the pineal gland that is released at death, which Swerdlow refers to as “harmonic energy”. It is this energy that the Reptilians digest, and which gives them the power to maintain their illusory human form. It’s interesting to note that it’s been scientifically proven that the pineal gland produces DMT, a psychedelic drug made famous in the writings of Terence McKenna, who praised the wonderful psychoactive qualities of this amazing compound that could seemingly transport someone to another planet in a matter of seconds, then redeposit them back on Earth mere moments later. The pineal gland has also been referred to, in metaphysical literature, as the seat of the third eye, and that when activated will bring us immediate illumination and unlimited wealth. So no wonder those Reptilians are jonesin’ for their annual Bohemian Grove-DMT-pineal gland-harmonic energy-juice fix. You gots to get down!

Kenn Thomas finally arrived via his Dallas detour, and took the podium to deliver his lecture Parapolitics: Contemporary Conspiracy on Planet Earth outlining the mechanics behind the Kennedy assassination, and how this all relates to current day conspiracy politics. Like a sports analyst breaking down a pro football game, play by play, Kenn did a similar number on the Zapruder film, during the course of which he identified the various alleged participants in the Kennedy assassination parade, such as “radio control man” and “umbrella man”. As Kenn pointed out these different apparent assassins, an indignant voice arose from the crowd: “What about the driver!?” In this case, the driver of the Lincoln Towncar carrying the pres was Secret Service Agent William Greer, who some speculate was the actual assassin. This theory came courtesy of the late conspiracy researcher Bill Cooper during the late 80’s/early 90’s, when Cooper was traveling the patriot lecture circuit showing a grainy, multi-generation version of the Zapruder film, which he claimed showed Greer turn around and pump Kennedy’s head full of hot lead. Or so the theory goes. Just the same, when Kenn was questioned about the driver-shot-Kennedy-theory, he pretty much pooh-poohed it, which in turn caused the vocal fellow in the audience to stomp out in the middle of the lecture, because that’s how emotional we darn conspiracy buffs can get when our own pet theories get blow away, just like JFK.

During that evening’s speaker’s banquet, I caught up with Kenn and Hustler correspondent Skylaire Alvegren as we shared with one another our respective recent exploits into the realms of conspiracy research and assorted high weirdness. Along with working on the forthcoming launch of a Southwestern Fortean Society Branch, Skylaire mentioned that she will soon be attending–along with Coast To Coast AM host George Noory, and some other observers–a forthcoming alien implant removal to be performed by Dr. Roger Leir, noted podiatrist and alien implant taker-outer.

Skylaire Alvegren . Doug Hawes. Kenn Thomas.

Skylaire Alvegren . Doug Hawes. Kenn Thomas.

As for Kenn, he’s been busy of late finishing up a Reader’s Digest book on (you guessed it) conspiracy theories, along with putting together the latest issue of SteamShovel Press, which should be hitting the alternative newsstands soon. Over dinner, our conversation predictably gravitated to November 22nd, 1963, as a conspiracy minded couple across the table quizzed Kenn on the particular mechanics of the Zapruder film, which thoroughly illustrates that the deadly shot came from the front and to the side, as opposed to the fairy tale version (from the rear and above) featuring Lee Harvey Oddball in the Texas School Book Depository sniper’s perch with a cheap Italian rifle and an itchy trigger finger.

In the course of revisiting these gory details, some other banquet attendees sharing our table started getting a bit queasy in between bites, which reliving JFK’s gaping head wound is often apt to do. So out of courtesy, Kenn cut short his detailed exposition of what went down  that dark day in Dallas when the head snapped violently back and the blood and brain matter gushed forth, as Jackie reached around on the trunk of the Lincoln Towncar trying to retrieve Jack’s partially blasted brain pan. All of this, it could presumed, set in motion the continuing chain of events that have been revisited in such conspiracy littered offerings as the Twin Tower disaster and all the major conspiracy theories that have unraveled since that coup de ta in Texas so many years ago.

To switch gears, Skylaire let us in on her forthcoming alien implant removal adventure, which segued into Kenn’s recent discovery that he has some sort of implant of his own that’s causing discomfort to his right knee. By going through old medical records, Kenn discovered that some sort of accident occurred at a skating rink during his youth, though he has absolutely no memory of the incident, which portends to possible mk-ultra mind control tomfoolery, or so Kenn suspects. Maybe.

When Kenn mentioned he was considering surgery to have this foreign object removed, I reminded him of Jim Keith’s ill-fated knee operation which cost the fabled conspiracy researcher his life. Kenn immediately decided that maybe knee surgery wasn’t such a good idea after all.

Entertaining the assembled banquet goers was Dave vonKleist, host of the popular internet radio show, The Power Hour. During his set, vonKleist delivered a humorous and rapid fire rant on those themes near and dear to the patriot movement and conspiracy theory scene, such as the fraudulent federal income tax, 9-11 censorship and the forthcoming one world government. VonKleist–acoustic guitar in hand–rocked the house with a number of conspiracy related tunes, the most noteworthy being a ditty called “Show Me The Law”,  a further amplification of the apparent illegality of the federal income tax. Do we sense a trend here? To this end, Kenn and I shared our mutual concerns about the incessant saber rattling by those in the patriot movement who make heavy weather out of this whole issue, which–it should be noted–landed the likes of conspiracy researcher and mega-patriot, Bill Cooper, six feet under after “They” pried the gun from his cold dead fingers. A cautionary tale, indeed.

Day two’s first speaker was Parliament Member Ashley Mote, who–before his election in 2004–conducted an extensive ten year investigation into the hidden agenda of the European Union. During Mote’s lecture, he delivered some controversial hot button proclamations regarding the insidiousness of multiculturalism and its disastrous effects on Great Britain and the United States. In this regard, Mote made mention that the day was soon to come when a His0panic would occupy the Oval Office with his finger poised precariously over the nuclear bomb button, which Mote evidently considers an ominous prospect.

After Mote delivered a slew of similarly racially charged comments, a woman seated a few rows in front of me sprang up like an agitated jack-in-the-box and exited the room in a huff. To this, my friend Doug Hawes leaned over to me and wryly noted: ”I think the audience feels more comfortable hearing about the Reptilians”.  Somehow Doug’s comment struck me as one of the funniest things I’d heard in quite awhile, which in turn caused me to bust out laughing at a totally inappropriate point in Mote’s lecture, as heads turned around with raised eyebrows wondering what I considered so darned funny about the insidious European Union.

Whatever the case, I don’t believe Ashley Mote was suggesting that Hispanics are any less qualified than Anglos to run the good ol US of A., or any other country, for that matter. However, the gist of Mote’s monologue seemed to contend that: The EU/Three Amigos = multiculturalism = loss of cultural identity = New World Order = the transformation of sovereign nations into slaves of the corporate global elite.

Following Mote was Dave vonKleist, who–at one point in his presentation–brought up Google Earth and projected it on the big screen, then zoomed in on an area of San Diego where a certain military installation is located, and then zoomed in closer to a structure on the installation which, shockingly enough, is shaped like a perfect menacing nazi swastika that doubles as a Navy Seal’s compound. This, of course, sent a chill through the room accompanied by a chorus of horrified clamors. In fact, one lady became so unglued she shot up from her seat and dashed out of the room, shouting: “I can’t handle this!” Now, that’s entertainment!

During the previous evening’s dinner banquet, Skylaire and Kenn mentioned their desire to visit San Jose’s Rosicrucian Park, which turned out to be a certifiable synchronicity, as Doug and I had also planned a visit there, so we all agreed to go together the next day to get our Rosicrucian groove on.

While strolling about Rosicrucian Park, we encountered a group of ladies dressed in yellow, and I wondered aloud if these were actual Rosicrucian members sporting their colors, to which my esteemed colleagues expressed doubt. However, this mystery was soon resolved when one of the yellow laden maidens approached Skylaire inquiring as to what this place was, what with all the weird Egyptian architecture. The yellow clad dame went on to explain that she was attending a wedding ceremony across the street and had wandered over with the rest of her group to check this weird place out.

Kenn, Doug and I were some distance away as this conversation unfolded, which soon caught our attention as Skylaire burst out in a fit of laughter, so we wandered over to see what the commotion was about. It seems that Skylaire and this lady in yellow were commenting to one another about an enclosed ceremonial alter–restricted to “Members Only”–when the colorfully adorned dame remarked that the Rosicrucians probably conducted homosexual rites therein, which precipitated Skylaire’s aforementioned outburst. From that point the conversation apparently devolved ever further, as the colorfully adorned damsel remarked that Francis Bacon–a purported Rosicrucian–was “sadistic.” Now, perhaps our lady in yellow had somehow confused Francis Bacon with the Marquis de Sade, another purported Rosicrucian pervert, because when one thinks of “sadistic”, Bacon normally isn’t the first person to come to mind. Whatever the case, the whole affair seemed rather surreal, and may in fact be at the root of the entire Luciferian agenda that Stewart Swerdlow addressed at the conference in regards to an Illuminati plot to control our minds and bugger our behinds.

Afterwards–when I reviewed the photos I’d snapped in Rosicrucian Park–I noticed one chilling shot in particular, which revealed that Skylaire and Kenn might themselves be members of this Luciferian New World Order Conspiracy, and that they had somehow duped Doug and I into accompanying them to this devilish den for ulterior motives, most likely as some form of satanic initiatory rite. D’oh!

If you look closely at the photo in question, you’ll see the despicable Luciferian agenda in all its glory. In said photo, Skylaire’s right hand rests partially inside her pant’s pocket forming the devil’s horns, that satanic hand signal flashed by such high profile Satanists as George W. Bush and Bill Clinton at political rallies and Texas Longhorn football games. Meanwhile, Kenn seems also to be flashing some sort of secretive hand signal, which to date I’ve been unable to decode.

Shortly after Kenn and Skylaire flashed their sneaky subliminal hand signs, we visited the Rosicrucian Egyptian Museum on the grounds, which houses the largest collection of ancient Egyptian artifacts in Western North America, not to mention likenesses of many of the very same Egyptian gods and goddesses that Aleister Crowley grooved with such as Horus, Goddess Nut and the Ape of Thoth. And if all this occult symbology wasn’t enough to cause your average conspiracy theorist to have a brain hemorrhage, Skylaire mentioned a certain sculpture she was interested in checking out in the downtown area that was stirring up a measure of local controversy, which also turned out to have a healthy dose of occult symbology attached to it.

And so after grabbing a bite at a local pizza joint, Doug led us over to the Plaza de Cesar Chavez in search of a certain notorious Quetzalcoatl sculpture there. Along the way, a strange fellow appeared on the street decked out in apparent cartoon character accoutrements and hauling around a giant question mark, which certainly summed up our weekend’s adventure, in terms of getting together with like-minded folk and questioning consensus reality in all its manifest forms. At the core, this is what good conspiracy research is all about: looking behind the scenes of world events and asking the tough questions, as to who is manipulating our consensus reality, and what we can do  individually–and as a united front–to break free of the programming and thus create our own realities.

With such heavy thoughts burbling inside my cranial cavity, we soon arrived at the much dissed Quetzalcoatl sculpture, which has garnered a fair amount of negative publicity of late, as some critics have compared it to a coiled up turd, which it certainly resembles, at least to some extent.

Quetzalcoatl—it just so happens—relates back to that whole Reptilian mythos regarding a serpent race that existed throughout ancient cultures, and who are allegedly the very same beasties that Stu Swerdlow now connects to our modern day Reptilians, the true Illuminati rulers of the planet! And furthermore, according to Swerdlow, this whole reptilian situation started way back in the Garden of Eden, when the human race first commingled with this shady serpent race of yore, who subsequently encouraged Eve to take one big fat bite out of the apple. And, as synchronicity would have it, one of their more well known serpent gods was none other than Quetzalcoatl, which translates to “Feathered Serpent”. Back in the day, when the Aztec’s got hot and heavy into sacrificing virgins and such, it was to old Quetzalcoatl that these sacrifices were often made. If memory serves, it was in Wilson and Shea’s Illumintus Trilogy that this very same type of human sacrifice–of the Aztec/Quetzalcoatl variety–would be used to “immanentize the eschaton” and bring about the end times, or at least some sort of paradigm shift or change in consciousness, though not necessarily of the feel good New Age variety.

What was really behind the nazi concentration camps, according to the supposedly “fictional” Illuminatus account, was not so much designed as simple ethnic cleansing, but in reality a huge orchestrated form of human ritual sacrifice that would bring about this Illuminati New World Order, not unlike James Shelby Downard’s “Revelation of the Method”, where such events as 9-11 are staged as a magical ritual/mass trauma to entrain our brains to the ultimate design of the forthcoming One World Government/Illuminati dance party.

Appropriately enough, Skylaire offered herself up in mock ritual sacrifice to our hungry friend Quetzalcoatl, his fierce fangs feasting figuratively of her groovy psychic vibes. Ah, there’s something about a human sacrifice that always puts a spring in my step!

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