The Sack of Maracaibo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LaTGrV58wec

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KkhGkRahU6g

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_4jld9w22Q

-
Check this out. This is how dudes fuck themselves outta so much tail. They get all self conscious about dancing. They consider it a feminine sport. They know they can't do it. Never tried.

Here comes Mr Vain, baby! I ain't good at much, but I own that fucking dance floor. Why? Put in the time. I did it like a moron and went virgin into a club. I was a pretty good lookin young guy back then and I cleared the floor.

You don't hafta do that. Put on good shit when you're home alone and just get comfortable moving to the beat. Beat's king, right? For me that amounts to jerking in another direction in time with the accents in the music. If you get comfortable with that, then you hit the clubs. It's all about bein comfortable.

Man, chicks swoon at a good dancer. They got it in their head that if you can move on the floor, you can move in bed. They're probly not wrong. I'm the exception to the rule. I am straight up FALSE ADVERTIZING on that goddam dancefloor, man. I been dancin so long, I weild Saturn out there. If I had gotten started earlier, and never got married, I coulda disappointed thousands a women by now.

These days, dude, I go out there to worship. I don't look at anyone. I'm there for me and me alone. I'm there to get even better at it as I thank my God for this game. And when you do shit like that, the dancefloor fills.

You got any idea how good it feels to fill a dancefloor?

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GPZDX9_2oE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVnqHciXB7Y
-

Lotta dudes shoot themselves in the foot cause they can't muster the balls to look goofy when they start out. Builds fuckin character, bro. Highly recommended.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSfDV7c8aXU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TYv2PhG89A

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_D3VFfhvs4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlGXDy5xFlw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knBfwGl5sQY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8s5D4BcCghs
-

So man, I could choose to hear this as a siren song calling me out to LA. Instead, I'm gonna hear "Hola, eh?" or even "Hola, A!"

I got two options better than goin all downer and hostile right now. Plus, I'm kinda having a religious experience too, dude.

There's a time and place for hostile. It ain't now.

I wrote this story down before. I can't find it right now, but it'll get found eventually. I'm gonna rewrite it now and then I can check back to see how accurate it is. How they compare. How much embellishment has taken place.

The second time I met Jesus that maze was tryina run me all over the map (after I climbed back in the bastard). And it's been tryina get me to quit smoking EVERYTHING since I walked into it the first time. When I started smokin cigarettes my allergies were less severe. I extolled the benefits of weakening the immune system a hair to tamp down the unpleasant.

I saw a reader say that she was smoking right now because the energetic input and messaging was so great that she needed to tamp it down. This echoed hard against my allegries. But it only happened recently. While I was inside, I was believin everything they said. So I'm arguin with myself - "Fuck no! I ain't doin that! Why do I gotta start over from NOTHING!"

Jezu drops in like the wrath of a gentle God. I take my seat, not fully becalmed. Imagined image fades in. I am in a circle of entities. Front and right are the baddies. Can't distinguish em, but the tops of their heads are all chi daggers and steam. They're fuckin PISSED. Yellin across this circle I'm in at my boys - behind and to my left.

Ancestors, angels, and 'walk on part in a war' ethereals who heard all the reverb. Jezu enters from the left, hushing the crowd and smiling like "I got this."

He takes his time to parse the words perfectly. I realize the words have been hard negotiated.

"Wander slowly in the distance"

(Oh, Jesus, God, Thank You - Plucked me outta that maze, twice now.)

"You don't wanna miss this"

(That's my sister. I just know)

"Regarding the smoking, toking..."

Then I lose the exact words, but I get the gist, right?

He tells me "Whatever you do, don't cut out the weed. Dude, you are soooo much better with the weed. Nobody's tryina make US ALL look bad here, right???"

Which makes that "Play high" shit funnier'n ya think.

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zMXKqBq9Pw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2JWJYLNUq4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzAO9A9GjgI

-
Uh... We had an agreement, ladies. You stick to your side a the goddam boat. You women scare the ever lovin shit outta me. Fall into flirtin with ya.

Hey, what movie is this from?

"The vatican has dealt with pirates and terrorists. We're not about to just roll over for some schmuck from New Jersey."

Same movie as...

"I remembered your penchant for those unmasculine european coffees."

Think about that for a while. From over there.

Madam, I have no right to ask you for anything. I am still in your debt. Would you make me feel like I'm ridin through the snow in a forest on horseback one more time?

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZaykU7XzXQ

-
Yeah. Afer Ventus can sit over here if she likes. You two hotties, stay on the other side a the goddam boat.

"It's a ship."

Up yours, Maddy.

Already won
Foretold war drum
Sound in faith and remembrance
Of the vain
and ego stained
Wish em cocaine and temperance
Mosh pit hospitals
Lasers
The most impossible
Players
Raving rays of rainbow
Raise an army
Fellow corpses
No remorses
Forged with fire still on me
Stored gun and food
Stocked up on wood
Didn't realize I was the zombie
Anyone else out there
Dumbstruck but well prepared
And maybe feelin just a little James Bond-y?
Take yer last swig er hit
Of that ol trigger switch
And then wish em all peace be upon thee - [GUNFIRE IN BACKGROUND]

Mind enshrining
Fates rewinding
Grinding scales
The Chosen Few
Laughing happily
Draft naturally
Mending sails
Unbroken Blue
Hey man
I don't understand
Is it me or is it you?

Nested vessels
Sing of crews who
Bested "specials"
in dress blues, you
Never seen a lucid bruiser
Like the boys in my fuckin crew
I pull sorceress and ninja
And if ya listen on the wind ya
Just might hear a whiistlin fist
Before it hits ya
Because you won't see it, Ace
You'll be starin at the face
Never knowin what just strung ya up and lit ya

-

Marshall?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ip5Q_BfJF8Q

-
How long do storms in Africa last?
-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0xHlgWQvAk
-

Soul Harrying Assassins

They don't move silent, motherfucker
I'm sure you'll hear em comin
Graveled vengence
Roars rememberance
New mad lions stalking prey
Feel's like a father's justice
Pushed too far and here to stay
He'll let you know they're comin
Listen for the dirty birds a-hummin
Relearn all yer gunnin, boys
Cause that grizzled hard-on don't play

When the light collapse
And the moon, perhaps
Has a slight relapse
Throwin off the maps

And the dawn is like
Fourteen hour hike
From where you dropped the mic
To the morning light

Close your eyes and hear
The adore and cheer
Of your father near
Whispered in your ear

Then get up and start blastin em
Mad castin, trashin em
clash-rashin bastion grab
Plans to ration em dastardly
Rat bastardly thrashin em all masterfully
Burn down and cast to sea
All that would stall my family
For they will know His name is The Lord
When you strike down upon them
His great vengence and furious anger

Then the shock troop
Locked groups ever tightenin
Rock loops clearin stoops
Leave ya staggered, enlightenin
Move in slow in the hopes
Michael's Will'll be kitin in
Watch your yellow chakra
Cause it's that he'll be brightenin

Next comes the heavy weight
Bulletproofed at heaven's gate
You ain't paid the levy, wait
This nigga's fixin to end your debate
No wispy shit or turn of fate
Is takin food off this dude's plate
Muscle clad busnessman
Hope you do not
Ever hafta witness him
Untie yer knot
Or break your big sister in

Come rat a tat rat a tat
Dirt merchants go splat
Up from below and long ago
And showin up with his own two gats
Can't miss the gist
Of the smoke from his fist
Tossin assholes both to and fro
Daddy said his vocals
Would demo the minds of yocals
So we straight chain the motherfucker
Til we need somethin dragged below

Master of Fables
Bleak enables
Conjured May bells
And the storm
Treads so lightly
Beats so sightly
Dawning nightly
Souls reborn

I don't think you assholes
Know where you're goin
Get Jamaica high
With all the grass that yer mowin
No I'm sorry
We all know I'm not the one to critique
But I really liked the bench
Outside that boutique
Are we late? What's the hustle?
We're goin for zig zags
I like you fucks
But when you drive trucks
It's kinduva mixed bag

Like a nigga set free
Fuckin panther in the trees
Knock knock
All done
Sift your corpse from the leaves
Breakin bread and talkin
All the while stalkin
chalkin bastards up to
God and stainless steel
Don't fancy the dance
When his goddamn glance
Turns into his motherfuckin heel

Methods so heavily
Held to the chest
Smoke wagon revelry
Graces the nest
Can't seem to stop
Takin off this vest
Too many swingin dicks to hug
Habeas Rex
We'll talk lanes and checks
So fuckin grateful I don't hafta turn you into a rug

Rear view mirror
Still can steer her
With Mable locked in my right hand
Always hold her
Never scold her
Soldier in a dark land
Hey man, tell me if motherfuckin dreams come true
All I can see in your mirror is blue

-

Em,

Dude, you are so much better'n me. Drop it into low gear so the old man can hear ya. Thanks, stud. I was wieldin a little illusion there. Tryina make a point. You and I both know technicals go a LONG way. I'll stake that fuckin claim, right? Stake it like a vampire. It's jaw dropping to watch. Your self-redeemed last bastion dialect.

You gotta give me some leeway on the Bleach shit. Newbie like me walks into a room like that, he tends to grab at anything that'll give him a leg up. You're an intimidating fucker. Sorry, dog.

You know who else are intimidating fuckers? Cube and Snoop. I don't wanna play with those assholes. I'm beat up and shitty, already. Done fightin. There are just too many to overlook.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MdABLcI7RI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeumyOzKqgI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmfSJfA6m-k

-
Alright boys, I shit ya not
The game just fuckin started
I fucked around and went to ground
And my sisters grow more charted
You, brave and fewest
Are here to protect me from the bluest
Sister princess witch you ever fuckin knew

Battle sails, tread lightly
Recheck the lamps cleaned brightly
No hostile moves just wrapped tightly
Tell me when you think she can sight me
Wanna be smiles
"ain't seen you in awhiles"
I don't know if this bitch wants to fight me

Just then it gets overcast
Randy eyes dart up the mast
In both fear and frustration
I got swarms and formations
Of wing-ed singlettes drifting
Near and through the bless-ed future and the past

I'm gonna stand here
I gotta make contact
The rest a you assholes
Go brace for impact
Hold the smile
This girl's guile'll
Break your goddam contract

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlxByc0-V40
-

Heeeey, baaaabe! How ya fuckin doin?
No I told em all to go below
Don't want my boys and your girls
To just drop formation and start screwin
So I cleared the decks
Wtih due respect upon your gracious laugh's intrusion
I have news and ale
And a mariner's tale
That comes to happy conclusion

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDZJPJV__bQ
-

Stay and slay then
Bring the maven
I've got views for fuckin miles
Wanna talk the sunset
Promenade with slight beguiles

I was scared of the Golden Singlette at first, right? Just didn't even know how to approach her. Stipe always came off tryina beat me. Outwit me. Bey's energy always felt comforting under any surface tension I felt. I say Bay and spell it Bey. Is that cool, Beybe?

Hey babe, don't go just yet. I'm fuckin horrified about overlookin so many.
Wrote a song titled Tomb of the Unknown Betty.
Kinda pictured you standin atop a jetty
Others here and there
Tried to write em all one fair
With love scope clocked at both divine and petty
Tell me how this comes off
Leave ya loverly, or lost?
Lemme light that while I recite it
If you don't mind, it'd
Do me good to know if the faux Scot accent was unsteady

-Uh, cancel the Scotchman. This one ain't built out for Northern Monkey yet.

Man, this chick bothers me more than the rest
Like a bird that's been flown too far from the nest
Naught but sisterly caring that still warms my chest
Cloaked in disknowing, ill-flowing, unguessed

I don't know what to tell ya man
A feeling of distance unlike the other betties
I don't know her work from Adam
And the two abuse all my steady
Tell the last of cannon to grab socks and make ready
Double the eyes in the crow's nest
If the weather should get heady
See, this is the shit that pisses me off
We don't know what this bitch can do
We'll stow you below
I'll make with the show
Polish my buttons and try to man through

What have so many years taught her
Long lost sister, or satan's daughter
She pulls any shit
Make sure she's well lit
Cause we got lotsa sharks in the water

Oh shit, is that her?
South South East
See that blur?
On the horizon
Like a cloud or waves of heat?

And that sound, man
lost and found, man
can you feel it in the decks?
Man, if she was onboard
Feel six kindsa adored
Jacked up to dome homies
And start breakin necks

Get your ass belowdecks
I'll fuckin see if this ho checks
Out- if not, I'll say Anaconda
Gimme a swig
A that pisswater shit
Feel like I'm about to meet Jane Fonda

Bama Black Lace, you are fuckin fun to play with. Your man is all balls. I don't know him, either. Dude comes off like he's been sittin in the back a the room the whole time observing EVERYTHING. You knew he was there. But was he the boss watching his employees, or was he the potential investor given free reign of the operation for analysis? He sits there long enough, and simply understands the game better than anybody else. Is he kinda like that?

Beybe, you had me baffled. I was playin fucking Flash Gordon when I met you. You are so much cooler than I thought. Thanks for humoring me. Really means a lot.

I wanna give away the ending to you. Hangin out with you was the final straw. I think I understand the game here. Thank you, beautiful. You're another one I owe. Let's you and me settle up on the other side.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPd095rDzFc
-

Man, I like where your fuckin head is at, Irish. You, me and Ronin are all Sun Tzu. "The essence of warfare is speed." Man, I been fucked by speed so much on this ride...

My lesson's been in Divine Timing. That's when the universe goes. "Hold up a minute, asshole, I'm tryina make this perfect and everything ain't quite lined up yet. Slow the fuck down, or do ya want me to fuck up the good part?"

Divine Timing is a bitch, Em. Slower than anybody wants.

But I may a clocked this perfectly. So, I'm gonna make Irish's move for him. Before the Boy embarrasses himself with my Mommy Issues. Let's you and me build a time bomb outta my Mommy Issues. Well, you can call em what you like. I got Maven Issues.

But we'll play your game, Boy. You and me'll park the IRA SWAT van down by the river and build a time bomb outta my Mommy Issues. Oh, that's right. It's already built. It's rigged to go off July 23rd. Just seemed like a good time for honorin the goddess with a little righteous warfare.

My personal bomb is rigged for the 22nd. Gives me a day to land and brace for impact. I'll be the primer. The fuse.

So, this is my 23, bro. Anybody who wants in, exit Minimum Safe Distance. Anybody who don't want in, don't look at the bomb.

Bomb looks like this, dude... The MMG. Maven Mother Goddess.

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uy5T6s25XK4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ljIb4xD-0U

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sk_D6XHo9OE

Good lookin time bomb, right?

Now check my sweetened ethers...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-OJOrlRzzqM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nr2VLI8jKww

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_AoCK5r2TWg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2rB6_s8y11w

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiVU-W9VT7Q
-

Hey, stud. If I were you I'd take back SAVAGE. Yeah, motherfucker, that's me. I'm the asshole in the bush who still knows the OLD WAYS. You wanna talk civilized, white man, I got your civilized right here. Not me. I'm the fucking SAVAGE. I don't want your civilized. It ain't.

Cause, Sup... You drop frequency like a FUCKING SAVAGE, brother.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSch10KzYAo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6e3bKUFclLw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0jq7jIa34Y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-HLxpWGCzc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKQwgpaLR6o

Gratitude

Gratitude's a funny thing
As you reel from Fortune's sting
You can't find it then and there
Perhaps a rote and rehearsed hair
But you ain't feelin' it while pluckin' out the thorn

Takes a little time to gather
All the things that you would rather
Be they trifle on a daring
Forgotten dreams or newfound tearing
But there's a kiss from Fortune's bliss after the mourn

If you can find it you have won
Another battle just begun
Strategic options light anew
The hard terrain, dark and askew
The adept thanks life's victimhood into brief sojourn

Picture this, I dare ya
And if not, I don't care ya
Gonna do what you wanna do, ya little prick

If I told ya about a hopeless boatless island
You were walking
Alone and broken
You were stalking
That didn't seem to care whether you lived or died
Would you tell me I was joking, choking,
Bullshitting and bloking
About this highland mind new island
Limes and weasels, do or die land
Would you be able to even hear me in the tide?

Enough food and drink
Without the kitchen sink
But not a soul to sit and talk about your wonder
I think I'd shoot myself
Or stow my heart upon a shelf
And become a wide-eyed murderous fucking blunder

Then one day you catch a glimpse
Of other islands with other pimps
Cursing sky and water at their plight
Other songs of broken brothers
Which the wind gently recovers
And brings the echo of new brethren to your delight

How the fuck much would you pay
To be there on that day
When hope and boat building become the merry task
You'd hafta put in the time
To hate the lonely island lime
And see your only valued holdings leave your grasp

Cut to three weeks later
Energized and one boat greater
Leaving "home" for shit that you can't even see
Just the echo of another
Sister, chimpanzee, or brother
Fogged and hurting on their beach along the sea

Hull tight, forbidding seepage
Stop to bail only your weepage
As you paddle, sail, and fight against the squalls
Balanced work below you
A Father's hope bestow you
As jealous mistress cradles, ladles peaks and falls

And then sharply without warning
Break the clouds that you've been scorning
And you see it ain't a chimp, but stunning betty
And she starts to break a grin
As you maneuver in
On her perch atop her well constructed jetty

Do you have any fucking plan
If that should happen to you, man?
Or do you really want all take without some give?
Would you rather have the cash?
Live and die by Friends or MASH?
Do you even care what life you oughtta live?
I couldn't tell ya, man
Just talking
On the wind
Again now stalking
Lonely brethren for a crew I seek to build
Just other dudes on other isles
Strapped with vocal chords and smiles
Lost and limey, damn near broken
Cast in doubt and hardly spoken
Treading water certifiably half-killed

My kinda nigga
Need to up-rig a
Pontoon for this loveseat on the tempest
She weaves palm frond
Like fucking James Bond
So much easier when you fall in with an empress
Clouds will then lift
Set aflame and adrift
We roll Curly and your ill skies are the Shemp-est

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_SAx1kXSnk
-

Those are my ethers. I just need to punctuate.

Whose Maze???

Mike's Maze

It's a tale as old as time, really. Well... a couple a them irish boys get to crankin each other up and they wind up shovelin a buncha cow shit into a stolen Mr. Chippy van and passin out somewhere down by the river.

But not Bloody Sunday, dude. Well, the whole fuckin problem was that neither a these boys were drinkin. Goddam Irishman got two jobs, right? You ain't drinkin, you're battin five fuckin hundred. Whole thing coulda just gone the other way, right? Not Bloody Sunday.

Turns out, the pub's fulla Scotch Tape. Sticky situations caused by drunken northern monkeys, right? The whole fuckin place has this sing it, dance it, or kill it vibe. And these two irish boys are fiendin heavy off all the scotch.

Outta everything a four leaf clover ever bought ya, one a these boys went to school. Some say it was both of em, but I wouldn't bet on it. Whoever the educated bastard one uvum was, he starts talkin about how he don't think cow shit's the way to go, right? He's pretty sure they mean chemical fertilizer.

Refined white powder. Phospates and the like. Weapons grade cow shit. Well that carries the day and before long these assholes are hookin up regular to talk about refinin ethers.

Now I didn't see any a that shit, but I talked to a dude who also didn't see any a that shit. But he lived in the town where it went down. Dude said you could hear music comin from outside a town, like - archaic gaelic warming mixed with native american carmina burana. Yeah, I don't know what it means, either, dude. Only way he could describe it.

So, that's the lightweight shit. It get's more fucked up from there. Like, in an around the whole Bloody Sunday thing, weird shit's goin down all over town.

Way too many intimidating black people around. Some rapper's visiting, right? Entourage and security. Trouble is, nobody's got a fuckin clue who they're escorting. Well, you're talkin about a small Irish country town. How many fuckin black people they see in a year? Town's crawlin with em for like two weeks in July.

There was a bomb threat at the school so the kids went across the street and played volleyball. Or cricket. Or whatever the fuck they play over there. Under the smiling guard of like six a these coal black, probably armed, ear-piece wearers. Picture made the paper. Not much else to do out there. My boy said that was the week he met his wife. Well, that was the week she drove her car through his front porch. So you can imagine the romance not comin til later.

You remember Annie got her wings? Yeah, that was ALL BALLS. So it's that kinda shit, right? Abso-fuckin-lutely the craziest shit goin down, but none of it's really bad. It actually winds up being a blessing. Kinda all just works out if ya give it enough time.

For two weeks in July. Said there was a shiny black hummer with a snorkel parked for a long spell up on the sidewalk in fronna the herb shop. Said it reaked a Red Lobster. I don't think they even have those over there. Couple people saw this little mormon girl dartin into alleys. No, man, yeah that would fuck with me too. Not like a "Come play with us, Danny," vibe. Chick had a smile. Like she knew somethin you didn't. That shit can be unnerving, too.

But see, Bloody Sunday ain't a day. It's a whole fucking time frame. Those two sober fuckin irishmen mighta fucked up the whole game. You see, they weren't bullshittin when they said TIME bomb. You can look back and SEE the fuckin shockwaves. It's lookin forward that's a bitch. For me, anyway.

-

Dearest Goddess Mother,

We humbly beg of you to harmonize with this hazardous masculine blastwave. We've been taught by the beast to wield only entropy. We do so now, masterfully. We unleash its most elegant design upon this thing we have created to enslave us.

My buddy went to college. Business school. He didn't enjoy it or learn much worth a fuck, but he did sneak out this one little treasure and showed it to me years later. Businesses don't price their products according to what they need to operate. They price every product they sell acoording to what the MARKET will bare. If the average family can afford to pay fifty thousand dollars for a new fridge, they will. Why wouldn't you charge what you can get for it, right? More's always better. Bean counters were paid years ago to determine the new price of their products, should your minimum wage increase be made law.

When you raise the minimum wage - in your noble, feminine attempt to empower the weak - the businessman gets all of it. His accountants have already analyzed precisely how much they can increase their prices. This destroys the value of ALL the money. Your worldly leaders in blue should already know this. Why don't they speak of it?

I paid for those goddam sidewalks. NO FUCKIN MAN gets to put up a tent in the middle a my goddam sidewalk. Especially if I'm trying to walk my child somewhere. That is not the image of the city of light I am building in my little girl's head.

You could go Red and throw em all into labor camps or prisons. Or you could devise a better solution, BLUE STATER. So preoccupied with which green and ethnically diversified industries to attract to your neighborhood, you forgot the babies living in tents on MY sidewalk.

Your inability to understand your own most basically claimed principles disqualifies you from office, BLUE STATE POLITICIAN. It is either your ineptitude or outright collusion that leaves the only discussed solution a Red one. It is YOUR FAILURE that designed this brilliant one bit scenario - inaction or fascism.

Sounds like a world with a dark moon, to me.

Goddess Mother,

Can I get some light in this bitch?

You want your Solar Power so bad, let's do this. Build your solar field as rooftops for indigent housing. Anyone who wants to hose off and maintain his panels, stays for free. Check it out- you know how you can run telegraphs on geomagnetic current? Take that Geo and twirl it into that Solar, Tesla pulse wave harmonic like in an attempt to harmonize and amplify the waves, and see what comes out the other end.

Then, when the whole thing doesn't work, you're left with a fuck load of unpowered indegent housing that's NOT ON MY FUCKING SIDEWALK.

But we could never transition a society this programmed onto a more humane one. Who'd shovel the shit? America's Next Top Shit Shoveler would. You market the show as a buffet for young girls to pick a marlboro man. You black bar or digitize the unpleasant. Show nothin but sweaty arms and jobs gettin done. You shoot and edit it in a way to make everybody look good. Just a hair nobler than they really are.

Then you got dudes makin videos and writin essays to apply for the chance to shovel shit in their home town.

Here's what you do with the whole FUCKIN MONEY THING. Same as before. Immunity, but new rules. New game.

NO SINGLE ASSHOLE GETS TO OWN MORE THAN 100 MILLION USD OF OUR MONEY.

We grandfather the assholes who won the old game. Cheers. Beat us. Congrats.

New Game. You can keep 1 billion USD. Your children can't. When you die, you can give them all your money - up to their individual limits of 100 million. Less than a generation before your playing feild alters.

REAL TRICKLE DOWN ECONOMICS. Cap that shit and watch the market readjust downward. Instead of raising the minimum, we cap the maximum. The ever so pumped and primed capitalist no longer radiates his type A personallity for greed. He can still play the game, but now the bastard's workin for us. And if he's a good emplyee, he gets some a the perks. He is a celebrated man among his people.

Fuckers with more than a billion in assets show their hands and we realize how much better they are than all of us. Then, we take all the money - except up to 1 billion USD per person - and throw it in the middle a the board. Think about how we wanna spend it.

And we do that right after we nationalize the FED.

Whose money???

OUR MONEY!!!

And maybe we stop blaming TOOLS for the behavior of the broken people who employ them.

Maybe we address the person and not the label. Or commodity. Or teaching.

And maybe we stop thinkin about money as something that's always out of our grasp and we're always fightin to keep up with it. What if it was firmly beneath us and we used it as a tool of energetic exchange? Whole fuckin place would FEEL different, no?

It'd be like tunin all the strings to 432. Without havin to do it everywhere. So Nirvana still drives all its push.

And if it don't work, or we stagnate or "slow down" - whatever the fuck that means - and we don't like it, we try somethin else. Lotta options... We ain't gotta get it right the first time. Wise man once told me "Evolution requires a little friction."

-

And if it's all for naught, and this ship sink beneath the dawn

Gracious Maven Earth Angels, would you sing me one last song?

Something new. Not for me. For my boys. It's been too long.

-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eK12tDb6ZBo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36AX554A3ew
-

The First Hermetic Principal

The universe is mental.

This has many different levels of meaning to it. But the most practical level to understand is this:

Let me tell you about the day I've had. The gentleman in the fiat next to me decided I didn't exist and tried to exit the highway through me. I came this close to dumping boiling Mcdonalds coffee in my lap. Cheryl, at work, did NOTHING again today. So I'm already snowed under and now doing her job for her - again. The less than competent child they hired to run the info desk can't be found and I've told you how Ed reacts in a crisis. So guess who's got a third job today? And to top it all off, my machine's randomly disconnecting all day and Ping's not answering my calls. I was ready to shoot somebody.

Lemme tell ya about my day. I slalom fiats on the highway on my way to work. I got seventeen things that need to get done, so I'm in the game, right? I'm tryina hand off work to people, nobody's havin it. So I muscle up and crank out like six or seven things and my computer goes dark. Fuckin Ping. Check this out - asian dude, IT specialist, named fucking Ping. That dude's a hat trick if ya ever saw one. So I ping Ping. Nothin. But I saw his car in the parkin lot, so I go down to his office. Fuckin dude's playin Civilization. Eight... or whatever the hell they're up to now. So I ain't never seen Eight. Fuckin games just get prettier and prettier. He's got Shogun units on the map and I tell him "Hey dude, I need you to Shogun me some technology." Turns out his phone's been turned off since lunch. His voicemail box is full. Dude coulda lost his job. So guess who's responsible for gettin the computers back up n runnin? I ain't even done yet, asshole, sit down. That dude who I buy weed from at the info desk didn't come back from his break. And fuck Ed. But I can do alotta my shit from any terminal. So I sign in up front and pimp bettys for the rest a the afternoon like "Yes, ma'am, he's right down that hall. I really like yer earrings. They're too green to be turquoise..." Get em talkin about the sparklies they picked out this morning. Send em all off smilin. Work goes a lot easier when ya got chicks smilin at ya all day. Happy to see ya and shit. I might try and take homeboy's job from him.

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXy__kBVq1M

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jr4OFxHg2Vs

This is AA Mike Skyfall, ground to command.

- Go for command.

Beachhead secure. Indigenous crews forming and engaging in low level skirmishes.

- Yeah, man, we know.

Cool, well he told me to tell ya so...

- We get it.

He also said to tell you "Why the fuck does everybody else get to know what's gonna happen before he does?"

- Go figure. Are we really gonna do this again?

Hey man, he's startin to talk shit about his own higher self. Sayin shit like "Cocksucker's in cahoots with everybody but me." You can feel the resentment, man.

- Tell him "That is a perfect place to start." That'll piss him off.

Yeah, man, I don't wanna tell him that shit. You got somethin better than that?

- Whaddaya want from me? Hey bro, tell him this "If he knew what was comin next, he would SOOOOO fuck it up." Or better, this is that Saturn test he heard was comin.

Is it?

- Ask him if he really wants to know. Ask him if he really wants that kinda peek behind the curtain. Ask him if he thinks it'll ruin the game for him.

Copy ruin the game.

Hey man, can you mute that?

... Yeah, what's up?

Is this dude tryina fuck my mom?

No. No, man. No. ... Well... metaphysically? ... Kinda.

- Intercourse means alotta things, dude.

That thing ain't muted.

Yeah man, alotta times it don't matter what I do. Most useless job on the boat.

He tell you not to call it a ship, too?

Said he'd keel haul me if I did.

Musta cooled down by the time he talked to me. Told me KP with Kenny.

Is Kenny even here?

I don't think so, but, the dude's got big plans. Hey man, back to my original question...

Look, it's not like he and your mom are on the astral plane engaged in whatever the hell terrifies ya the most, right?

What is it like?

You simpletons are myopic like fuck. He ain't tryina fuck your mom, bro. That dude just tried to fuck EVERYBODY'S moms.

Looked like a lot more than tryin. Looked like months a sustained effort.

- Him a row ho.

Really?

Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally, it refers to any manufacturer of maternal influence.

You fucking children are adorable to watch. And you're not wrong, you just need to widen the perspective. He's fuckin mother Gaia.

No shit?

Lucky prick.

Ok, so if we're not wrong, he's metaphysically fuckin Gaia AND my mom?

At the same time.

Relax, stud. God knows what it looks like on the other side, but on this side it looks a lot more like flirtin. Intermingling, twirling, and harmonizing of energies. Good conversation. Smiles and winks. The old fellas used to call that kinda shit 'cahoots.'

You seen those pictures of Tesla where he's sittin between two ...nodes, and the electricity's arcing between them? You touch those nodes together and the transfer's invisible. But the fact that those nodes aren't physically touching creates all the razzle dazzle.

Really? Is that how it looks from down there? Because all I can see is "Cheetos and blow jobs for all my men." And, frankly, the foul mouthed thief coulda at least said "Chocolate." Sounds more biblical that way.

Cheetos is local color, babe.

Right, orange, the one note this philistine plays. You say chocolate, because it's timeless. Global.

You also hit the whole race thing, too.

Are you sayin Cheetos ain't global?

No, man, what she's sayin is "Chocolate and blow jobs for all my men," sounds biblical.

More biblical. Yes... Than Cheetos???

Fair point. Then shouldn't it be "Chocolate and blow jobs for all my men and women?"

Not if ya want it to sound biblical. You say chocolate because it caresses the masculine - feminine dynamic better for more swaths of people. And it doesn't have all the industrial sloth and gluttony associated with it. AND you're still hittin that Sacral chakra. Horny prick still gets his orange. Women think of sex like romance. Flowers and chocolates. Guys think about blow jobs. You're plucking everyone's strings where they wanna be plucked - MORE biblically than Cheetos, man.

I don't know, babe. It sounds like you're tryina 432 all my strings...

I'll tell ya what the putz did wrong. Goin all fuckin Che Guevara on the businessman.

- Him a rojo.

Those grandfathered assholes are gonna shrink from that flat 1 billion.

Who gives a fuck?

Yeah, I was thinkin that too. A percentage?

Yeah, man, cause then it kinda honors the old game. They still get to enjoy the more that they've made. Not as much as they have, but the game for the rest of their life will be commensurate with the riches they accrued during the old game. Not some autocratic communist, paradigm-jarring, arbitrarily leveled playing field.

They still get to lord their ill gotten over people?

A percentage of it - for the rest of their life. And ill gotten's a little strong. They worked. They were sold a bag a lies like the rest of us, and tried to master their world. Their man hours should amount to something, no?

So what percentage?

I figure, it's a businessman, right? You wanna honor his old game? You start at 25 percent. He can keep cash and assets worth 25 percent of what he's got now. To a businessman, everything's negotiable. EVERYTHING AIN'T. But some things can be, so we start him at 25. If he's cool, he says 75 and we meet in the middle.

Keeps half a what he's got?

Other half in the Community Chest.

To a minimum of 1 billion?

Yeah. You got 1.2, we only take the .2. Cash and assets. The idea is that money is power and we decided we don't want a never ending race for 'more.' Now we force on the businessman the notion of 'enough.' Similar merit-based capitalist paradigm, with altered intent - moneywise. Now he must compete with ideas and innovation and ease of use. Not outsourcing and late fees.

I don't know why you're negotiatin with terrorists. I'm more of a torches and pitchforks kinda guy.

Hey man, it could come to that. But let's do everything we can to pitch a no hitter. Give em every opportunity to come clean and make it right. Angelic like. And if they can't see the light? We got fall back plans with gorillas like you in em.

Seems agreeable.

It's a goddam offer they can't refuse.

Nah, man. It's a new paradigm. Fuck your old zero sum game. There are better games. Ones where we all win.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlZ4bFVoWQE
-

Why Karl Pilkington deserves the Nobel Prize for Thermodynamics and Education.

Karl told a story about his parents taking a large glass ashtray and setting it on his belly when his stomach hurt. Karl explained the genius folk science of "Old Cold." Like a large hunk of glass or a plate. The things you always touch and they feel cold. Karl says puttin one a them on a hurtin stomach does the trick.

I never had occasion to try that particular application of his genius gift of folk wizardry. But I was able to riff on it. Wife had menopausal hot flashes. I got Carl's ashtray ringin in my head as my wife's sputterin and takin clothes off all of a sudden.

"Hey, woman. You remember that ceramic tile you love so much? On the floor in the kitchen. Take your fuckin shirt off and lie down on that ceramic tile." They all say no the first time. You gotta badger or seduce em. Cured. Instant CURE for hot flashes. Try it, baby. The joys of democratized thermodynamics. Lay back and feel all that excess heat just get whisked away by that ceramic tile. Straight up folk geniusry. Old Fuckin Cold, baby.

Fucking western medical science can't use the word "cure" but it knows everything already. It knows you're fighting entropy your whole life and it's got a pill that'll keep that impending entropy at bay for just one more day. Cocksuckers diagnosed me with The Diabetus a few years back. One letter, Blood Glucose circled, with handwritten words "You have Diabetes. Make an appointment to discuss."

HA! I know that's not how serious medical issues are addressed. And I damn sure know you don't tell a patient he's got something serious based on ONE FUCKING TEST. So the whole thing rang hollow to me. I'd been in the conspiracy game a while, but only light medical stuff. "It's all fucking lies," was the mantra I attacked my alternative diabetes research with. Yup. Confirmed. Lose weight, lose diabetes. Cured.

Oh, you're not really cured.

Really? Every medical indicator you possess dictates that I'm non-diabetic.

Well, if you go back to eatin that way the diabetes'll come back...

No, brainjob, It ain't DIABETES 2 The Revenge. It ain't my old diabetes comin back to get me. It is me falling back into patterns that cause my cells to forget how to properly deal with insulin. It is my mind and it's patterns that cause the labeled "condition."

If I go out and get bit by a snake, and then I get anti-venom I am cured. Done. But if I go back out there and start fuckin with more snakes, was it the old snake bite comin back to kill me?

You don't run experiments that way. You don't maltreat 50 lab rats in an experiment and then say "At the closing of the experiment, all rats survived. But if we woulda kept fuckin with em and reinjecting them with crap, they'd all be dead. So we can't say they survived, technically." That's not how science is done.

Who decided that "cure" meant an immunity to all future eventualities?

This western medical paradigm leaves the lives of our most precious cargo in the hands of men and women working 18 hour shifts! You wanna talk about focusing on entropy! Give these assholes highly precise pharmaceutical weapons and then overwork and sleep deprive them. Definitely believe EVERYTHING western medicine tells you. They understand how the human body operates.

Why does our science have such a hard on for entropy?

Well, in the end it could all go to shit. Ain't been to the end, never seen it, but it probably does. I can watch a car break down or a bike rust to know where all this is goin.

That's bullshit, man. Well, call it what you want, it ain't scientific. We rats a NIMH up at night, unlockin the cage and shit. Where's your entropy now?

-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDNlAg6ZxxY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIwgrsu5iZk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHy5YROllws

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=feeIOZH7wr4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buTrsK_ZkvA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-NhAQJuOuI

More storms for the Gaelic Nagel.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TTQhIeFhBk

This was written in the maze, high on purp, as a response to Yeez alone.

Need no paint
Blackened feint
Slipping light through the tree tops
Thick arm rising
No disguising
Tabi boot knee socks?
You pickaninny
Guinea
More hits than three wops
Come to ground
No targets found
You're far better dressed for these ops

Act like I'm swoopin in to save ya
You been doin this so long
Just wanna rebehave ya
Tighten up the song

We know you could use some pointers
And I've got some merry time
Lemme tell ya about anointers
This is my night's fuckin dime

The humble ones got bigger guns
They pimp the crowd low gear
All alluring and mysterious
So twice the chicks give ear

It seems to me you roar your great
Too far and wide to listen
Debreast the bars, we got your Mars
At ease, and trim your mizzen

Hope ya smoked em when ya had em, bro
Game starts now, sweet undertow
If you're feeling out-matched
Ill-monied, over-snatched
You can bunk up with the women below

I'm fixin to call your market half lit
Won't say they hear from a half-wit
But craft zit
Shaft crit
Chunder money, lookin down
Pissed at who won't shine yer crown
Actin fool
Throwin tool
In every black white or brown
Got nothin special?
A bunkered Ethel?
Who you don't take to town?

I don't know you
Hafta show you
Any of my credentials
Your kind words
Are so absurd
And way too deferential
Just a codger
Brim and bother
Fuck those twats- presidential
I bring fire
Lute and lyre
To your thoughts existential

Look, stud, I ain't yer yes man
Nor yer Zulu nigga's chess plan
I dug both yall before I ever knew ya
But He's the new thing
Kiss the goddamn ring
I wanna black
But I really wanna blue ya

-
Later, still in the maze, I found this. I think I was looking for keywords. Monster.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjv1W2g2er4

Hey dude, carve a new notch
Cause that shit about sasquatch
Hit me right where I needed to feel it
I hope we're still sunny
Cause that shit's fuckin funny
I been low and I think your ass healed it
Not to mention the throat
Man, that shit was all GOAT
Waved my banana and you fuckin peeled it
You know, way back then
I stole "acumen"
From your bag cause I wanted to wield it
The shit worked out great
Climbed the empire state
That magic, my fate, and you sealed it

It sounded absurd
The story I heard
About you tellin assholes you're Jesus
I laughed and talked smack
That fucker's on crack
He's either gone or he's fixin to leave us
Now I'm bathed in blue
And with all I been through
That shit sounds so much less egregious
I wanna know
If you still think it's so
First in line if you've got shit to teach us
I won't make that claim
It just comes off so vain
No motherfucker down here's gonna believe us

Regarding the quim
I know I can't win
Probly best to just hover above it
Divine Feminine
Is the army I'm in
If I'm outta line- tell me to shove it
It seems to me wrecked
All the harsh disrespect
For a thing that should teach men to covet

-
But long after this, I was still sour on Yeez. I figured they were all watchin me, and it pissed me off. So I looked up Ye's net worth. Started talkin shit about people with 4 billion dollars. Got my near senile covid vaxxer fascist aunt to switch from badgering me into a jab and talk shit about "anybody with 4 billion dollars..." I think that's why TI needed to call me out. But I never wrote negative shit about Ye beyond my first.